Friday, April 14, 2006

IMO UN wasted money

click photo to enlarge
I imagine the conversation went something like this.

Chairman: "The International Maritime Organisation, the IMO, is one of the smallest of the United Nations' organisations with only 300 staff. We need to raise our public presence, particularly here at our London headquarters. Our building is modern and by the Thames, but it doesn't really advertise us. Gentlemen, I'd like to hear your suggestions as to how we might raise our profile!"

Member 1: "Well chairman, I'd like to suggest that we have lots of ships in our downstairs windows. People like to look at ships, and we'd pick up the passing trade."

Chairman: "Whilst I agree that ships should feature prominently in our branding, I'm afraid the gentleman's suggestion could make us look like a toy shop. We might attract entirely the wrong sort, including children."

Member 2: "Well, how about having one big ship. I know someone with a few oil tankers going spare."

Chairman: "An excellent thought, but the size of your friend's ships might present a problem. Does he have anything smaller?"

Member 3: "How about the bow of a ship projecting through our entrance. Surely we know someone with a ship we can chop up and use."

Chairman: "We're getting somewhere now gentlemen. However, rather than use a real ship's bow, let us consider commissioning a sculptor to make an artistic representation - a universal symbol of maritime commerce, if you will. The combination of a ship and art will elevate our project and make a positive statement about our organisation."

Member 4: "An excellent suggestion chairman. To quote that venerable mariner, Captain Jean-Luc Picard, 'Make it so!'"

Dissenting voice from the back: "Bloody stupid idea. It'll make us look like we've been rear-ended by a drunken sailor!"
photograph & text (c) T. Boughen

2 comments:

Chris R said...

I'd heard that a dyslexic environmental activist was given written instructions to dump 'pig shit' in the foyer.
I told my wife this and she said "I don't understand" - thick as big ship?

Anonymous said...

Very funny and clever.  I laughed out loud at your thoughts, then having read the comment below, laughed even harder.  You should perhaps do more like this, but I understand that they have to strike a chord and feel spontaneous.
LA